My Partner has a Mistress…What To Do?

I had never imagined that I would be in a relationship where I had to be concerned about a Mistress as I have a lot to offer. I offer him my unconditional love and feel that love back. But it’s not enough to stave away the Mistress. Not only do I have to agonize about her, she has strength and a seductiveness that cannot be matched.
She clutches my man with determination and stamina that leads me to believe she is the devil herself. Her grasp is at times tender, enveloping him, creating a sense of euphoria, the experience…orgasmic. Suddenly, she digs her nails in; the euphoria is replaced with a primal need. Once again, he is under her spell.
She doesn’t make him happy, in fact the opposite is true; she devours his very soul. This is not love, not the kind of love he and I share, yet still, I know that when I am with him, he is thinking of her.
Their relationship is strong, all consuming, racked with guilt. Not from her, the guilt is reserved for him. She is not just a Mistress; she is an obsession, his obsession.
He has tried to leave her…many times. She gently massages him, drawing him back into her clutches, once again. She offers a hedonic experience. An experience he craves, to the point of thinking of no others.
Who is this Mistress who carries so much power?
Her name…Addiction! An all-consuming food addiction!
How do I compete with his Mistress? I believe. I believe in our love, I believe in his strength to overcome, I believe in him and I support him…unconditionally.

Confessions of a Food Addict!

Have you ever sneaked a tasty morsel, especially when your partner was not looking?

Do you typically put eating a meal as a very high priority?

Do you feel guilty after eating?

Do you have occasional binges where no amount of food will satisfy your cravings?

Does eating become an obsession?

If you answered “yes” to these questions, you may be a food addict!

Research is beginning to shed light on the plight of us mega munchers. To be clear, I am not referring to those amongst us who have the odd “naughty” treat, I mean those who are out of control and paying for it;  financially and with obesity! For those of us who suffer this syndrome, food is our nightmare! Most of us say we love food, and we probably do.

Interestingly, I started to write this months ago. I just saw the following article and felt like yelling Hallelujah! Article: Junkies and Food Addicts Share Craving Mechanism.

Can a Lap Band help?

For me, I still get the mega cravings. I need a hit! I can’t eat enough but if I use lots of willpower I can struggle along. I asked a friend on the weekend about his experience – he was banded a few months ago. I asked if the cravings went (as the lap-band promoters suggest) – he answered “bullshit!” – I’m with him.

The band helps a lot, but it does not take away the food addiction!

I dream of being free of this! The monkey off my back! I just can’t handle my dopamine! Perhaps they will work out a control for it – in the mean time – grind on!

Lap Band Cheating!

OK, I’ll fess up, I’ll go quietly… I cheated… bigtime!

After the pain, risk and cost of having a prosthetic clamped around the top of my stomach, I set off on a course of beating it! MAN! What a goose! My only defense is very bad habits!

Rule #1 Don’t drink any liquid before, during or after a meal — Broken

Rule #2 Don’t drink too much alcohol — Broken

Rule #3 Use a small plate and small portions — Broken

Rule #4 Don’t eat between meals — Broken

What a fool I have been – bad habits! I cannot believe how hard it is not to drink even water with a meal. I look down and the glass in my hand and on the way to my lips… I need a good spanking.

Well, my doctor, who has a definite evil streak, has me sticking to the rules and eating/drinking 600 calories a day for six weeks. Lets see how that goes! Fat sucks! It is such an addiction!

I will win though!!! If it kills me and the doctor 🙂

Lap Band deviations – attack of the fat demons!

I’m sitting in Sydney airport, a common pastime for me! The smell of raisin toast permeates the peaceful ambience of the Qantas Club lounge.

I suddenly feel I need to eat!!!

Am I hungry? No! Do I need to eat? No! Am I going to eat? Not this time!!!

My Lap Band was tightened further last week. It has been five months since the operation to fit the band and I have never really felt it was in the “sweet spot”. My weight has been hanging around the same figure for most of that time. I feel like it is working when I come home from the Lap Band “fill”, but that wears off after a day or so.

So, is the Lap Band working?

My doctor says he wants to be cautious, he does not want me getting food stuck or to begin vomiting… I’m with him on this. However, I am getting impatient. I want to move on.

After the last adjustment I can eat a lot less. Good! I have to retrain myself on food portions and “the rules” – don’t drink any fluid 30 minutes before and after a meal, eat very slowly and limit portions to about half a glass – is that half full or half empty?!

Six days now after the last Lap Band adjustment, I suspect we are very close or in the zone. I fill up very easily and I am not as interested in food. At last!!! However, demons still haunt my fears of food addiction – stress, boredom and habit.

I find myself picking between meals lately. Even now that the Lap Band seems to be right, I have picked… a little!

The fight now seems to be defeating these demons. After all, the Lap Band is a tool to help me change my eating habits – and my assult on my food addiction.

1) No fluids around meals!

2) Eat slowly!

3) Half a glass of food per meal – which is, as ever, half full!!!

Begone you dreaded demons!!! Roll on slimdom!